Hats... they come in different shapes and sizes. They come in different forms... Physically, you wear one at a time... unless you're the street boys... but metaphorically, you don several of them. And life becomes a huge balancing act.
My Sunday post is three days late. But I just gotta say... I love that I have friends to talk to when my vision is kind of blurring and I get lost on the way. Just got off the phone with Jonjon and Christel and they sorta help put me back into track... with a lot of things.
Like theater for example. I realized... it's such a huge sacrifice to not perform and be in the background.
I'm not even so sure if it's the performing I miss... perhaps it's the rehearsal period, the cast bonding, and the people you meet (which I've always believed is the wrong reason for doing a production)...
Admittedly, the bonding is different. And you are each other's worlds in so far as the production is going on... then a new one comes along... and you move on. You'll see their faces from time to time - unless they're a handful of friends you genuinely make.
It's fleeting but bohemian in its purest form. No day but today! Seize the moment. You are at your happiest at that moment. It will fade. You might be in a rut. But you will find it again. And life goes on...
Anyway, speaking of wearing a different hat, I'm thinking of really going down the producer route in the future - like full time. I mean admittedly... it sorta ghettoes you in a way from everybody else. Your struggles will be different. Your experiences are different. Your vantage point is different. Your way of thinking is different. Your anecdotes will be different. It's a lil bit of art but mostly about the business. And it can be a bit lonely at the top.
But I know my strength is really in the background and making things happen rather than being in the spotlight and performing. I like putting things together.
I like assembling talent - even down to the simplest hosting a party and having talented individuals synergize under one roof. I like putting things together. I like to nourish and foster relationships. And I think the producer route is something I really want to tread. I have much to learn though. Maybe I'll take courses in NYU on that. At least now I'm learning...
On the acting bit, I think it's the insecure child in me that really cries out, constantly looking for a home outside of my own in the absence of my own. The bonding and camaraderie and the sense of fraternity in doing a production is what I seek in so far as being in a production. Iba talaga yung bonding eh. I'll say it again.
But having gone through the corporate world and thinking of my time in theater in retrospect, my time in Friends of Rep, and my time in RENT, I believe I'm meant to be a producer. I will go down that path. I'm sure of it. Mark my words! I will be the best at it.
I will enable people... and as for the personal insecure child, that's an issue I sort of have to sort out on my own... and it's something that theater can't really answer for me.
WHAT I ATE TODAY:
8 pcs. chicken wings from Mc Do
Korean Barbecue from Arirang
1 pcs. tempura
1 cup of white rice
4 pcs. chicken wings from Mc Do
*haha. may feathers na ako
Beef Curry Noodles
Pork Curry Plate w/ Rice
French Fries from Burger King
2 Bites of a Double Whopper haha
SIGHTS AND SOUNDS:
*gabbi upside down. haha. she looks so long and cute!
ON THE WAY TO LCX
30 minutes treadmill in Fitness First Hong Kong.
*in fairness, nag-effort
POST HOLIDAY WEIGHT:
after 3 days of eating and drinking in Tali
after 4 days of eating and shopping in Hong Kong...
197 pounds... not bad
- 2000 and Thin