117-118: PERSONA

I don't know if you guys remember this game. It's an RPG (role-playing game) about all these high school students who all play a game of Persona one night (parang spirit of the glass), summoning and invoking spirits or "personas," and then an incident happens and well, they all discover that they all have an inner demon within them that grants them magical powers. Plain and simple, personas are spiritual beings nested within a person's innermost realm or psyche that represents the side of them that is not readily accessible to people. It's the part of them that they tend to hide or conceal from others, especially from the truth - of course in video game rhetoric, personas are bad ass creatures painted in a totally fantastical and hardcore manner.

Since then, about three or four Persona games have been released for the PS2 and PS3 and the stories or the way of invoking them have become more and more convoluted through each saga. The freakiest has got to be when the students are forced to shoot themselves in the head with some spirit gun to summon their Persona through each skirmish. Fucked up Japanese sense and sensibility that is as enticing as it is haunting. Hello Battle Royale.

Off tangent, I've been rethinking about being too much of an open book on the world wide web, and instead, carrying an air of mystery about me - cue music - James Bond - International Man of Mystery. Die Another Day. Maybe not so much as a mystery but also having some semblance of privacy and sanity because I've been so candid and frank about being dysfunctional, depressed, problematic, or emo that I seem to go down that downward spiral rather than be rid of it.

I mean seriously, who wants to be these things? Maybe, if I don't declare it to the world, then it starts to happen less and less. Maybe if I overcome myself with positivity and a go with the flow attitude, then I'll be a breathier, sounder, and more stable person. That is, after all, the essence of THE SECRET.

Back to my point, I've just been thinking about Persona and how there's an outer self that projects to be a certain way, and an inner self that is another way altogether - often times, polar opposites. More often than not, it's the inner self that cries to come out, and manifests how you really are, how you truly feel while the outer self is bound by all these social taboos, fear, insecurity, rules, and regulations.

Literally and figuratively, Persona personifies the Shakespearean rhetoric, "To thine self be true." I feel that the task of every person is to connect the inner self to spill over to the outer self. It's the only way that a person will truly find happiness in this world, and peace of mind. And CLARITY. More answers than questions Lord.

The world is already raptured with too much lies that to deny oneself of your own personal legend, your own personal truth, is unsettling, and to a certain point, unforgivable. Unless, the truth is too big that, ika nga ni Tom Cruise, "You Can't Handle the Truth..." That's just sad. Because oftentimes, the truth hurts... that or that the truth can be rewarding and it can actually, set you free.

WHAT I ATE TODAY:
Breakfast:
none

Lunch at Kai:
2 pcs. Dragon Roll
2 pcs. Chicken Kushiyaki
Watermelon Sake

Merienda:
Nachos

Dinner at Jollibee:
2 pcs. spicy chicken
1 cup of white rice
4 cups of Maxim Coffee

Alcohol:
1/2 Bottle of Red Horse

Breakfast:
none

Lunch:
1/4 cup of white rice
Sinigang

Dinner:
2 slices of pepperoni crunch pizza
2 slices of manager's choice pizza
1 slice of hawaiian pizza
5 pcs. mojos
1 pc. buffalo wings
3 pcs. calamares

Alcohol:
none yet

EXERCISE:
none


2000 and THIN