Thursday, March 25, 2010

DAY 74: PRETTY BABY

Long day of meetings today. Non-stop. But I had a good breather in between. Caisa met me at Mall of Asia, in Fish and Co. and we caught up over sinfully delicious fish and chips. I can't believe I had fries though... after so many months. But it was well worth it. It's nice to confide and catch up with a friend - especially now since I've been extra needy towards them. It doesn't help that I felt like such a loser last night because hardly anyone came from the ones I texted to come hang. My parents left again for Pangasinan so again... I am home alone. Story of my life nowadays.


I'm not used to being needy. I've always been the independent, deal-with-problems-on-my-own type of guy. I don't like involving other people in my life because I don't want them to see me as vulnerable and weak. I like being there for other people but I'm not necessarily comfortable having other people be there for me. I'm not that type of guy. I keep people near physically but I keep them from a distance emotionally. I have hoisted walls that are so high up that I don't easily let people in. In fact, I get awkward when my personal space is invaded. But those walls have crumbled and I've been exposed. That is ultimately unnerving.


Lately... I've been turning to my friends a lot for comfort because... well... I'm going through a phase. And it's been going on for quite some time now. But Caisa knocked a lot of sense into me. Caisa told me, above anything, and in anything I do, I should choose happiness. Being happy should be my top priority. And I guess... that's what I'm seeking. I'm seeking happiness.


HAPPINESS is Finding a Pencil,
PIzza with Sausage,
Telling the Time.

HAPPINESS is Learning to Whistle
Catching a firefly
Setting him free

HAPPINESS is Having a Sister,
Sharing a sandwich,
Getting along.

- lines from the song Happiness from the musical "A Good Man Charlie Brown"

Just got off the phone with my brother Ipe who's now based in New York. I like what he said when I asked him about how I should deal with depression, and how do I snap out of it? How do I not be lonely? He said... OBSESS ABOUT THE FUTURE! AND YOU'LL NEVER BE LONELY! He's absolutely right. I have to do some goal-setting because lately I've been riding with the wind... I haven't been setting goals when I should be preparing for New York and the future. That's a start!



WHAT I ATE TODAY:
Breakfast:
1/2 cup of brown rice
Bistek Tagalog


Lunch: Fish and Co.
1/2 serving of Philadelphia Fish and Chips
1 Cocktail


Dinner: Brooklyn Pizza
1 1/2 slices of white cheese pizza
2 spicy chicken wings
1 serving of spaghetti w/ 2 meatballs

SIGHTS AND SOUNDS:
Seen on the ear of yesterday's paper. Uhhh... yeah! Time for 2000 and Thin guys!

*Water looking so hot.

EXERCISE:
1 lap in the Polo Field
30 minutes circuit training at the Polo Gym

MORNING WEIGHT:
191 pounds


EVENING WEIGHT:
193 pounds


- 2000 and Thin

2 comments:

  1. Obsess about the future and you'll never be lonely. I like it. RT time. Love you bourg! <3 We're all here for you!

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  2. thanks bourg. love you! i'm smiling 'til my pisngi. choose happiness and obsess about the future :)

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